• MAN TALK
    • MARRIAGE 101
    • FAITH


Posted by Editor On JULY - 18 - 2011

Time flies, can you believe we are already past the half year mark? Just the other day we welcomed the New Year with long lists of resolutions. Well, the year doesn’t feel so new anymore, it’s that time of the year when energy levels sink, we get sucked into the routine of life and many times become complacent. All these are symptoms of Mid Year blues.


Posted by Editor On JULY- 18 - 2011

Growing up, I was a ‘someday girl’. I had dreams of someday publishing a book, someday working for a newspaper, someday being an editor, someday. Until one day many years later I woke up to the realization that someday was today; the only assurance we have, not 2 years from now or tomorrow but today.


Posted by Editor On JULY - 18 - 2011

For some April habitually brings in to mind Spring; sunshine, blooming flowers, the green of trees and sliding into flip flops. For me, April is just April because luckily where I live the beauty of ‘Spring’ and getting high on Vitamin D is something I experience every day.


Posted by Editor On JULY - 18 - 2011

As I kid, one of my all time favorite TV shows was 'The Jefferson’s'. As I write this, the theme song is playing in my head. “Well we’re movin’ on up, to the east side, moving on up, to a deluxe apartment in the sky. Moving on up, to the east side, moving on up,we finally got a piece of the pie.


Posted by Editor On JULY - 18 - 2011

February is a special month, apart from the red roses, boxes of chocolate, great deals and the romance, it’s also the month we celebrate the history and contributions of African American men and women to society in the name of Black History Month.


Posted by Editor On JULY - 18- 2011

Happy New Year!Yes, I know I'm a little late on the wishes just like the way I'm late with our new January Issue but it's finally here. New year, new layout, new name, basically, new things. Its all about the new new! For all those who knew this blog as The Ladies Room, I now introduce you to AfroElle; a blog for women of afro-descent from all over the world.


Posted by Editor On JULY - 18 - 2011

The year has literally flown by, I can't believe it's already December. To many, December is a month of in depth self evaluation and stock taking; taking that walk down memory lane to see if you accomplished the goals you set at the beginning of the year.It's also about looking at your present to see what has worked for you or what you need to eliminate before you head on to the new year.

Insecurely Confident

Posted by AfroElle On 11:33 PM
According to the Dove Self Esteem Fund 62% of all girls feel insecure or not sure of themselves and 57% have a mom who criticizes her own looks. As a young girl, I was certainly in that 62% because I did not “fit in” to the mainstream standard of beauty. From the time that we become conscious, the media does a job on our self-perception. The relics of white supremacy are still alive and well and the legacy of “black get back” beats our self-esteem into submission.

We all remember how our first names became linked to our striking physical characteristics.For me it was, “Donnie with the big nose…” Big, meaning above or larger than the average size. I can remember certain adults pinching my nostrils together in hopes of decreasing the size. Plus I had to wear glasses which felt like a“Kick Me” sign for my fragile self-esteem.All women, but more specifically black women have it difficult in an America where media representations of beauty are so limited in scope – thin, hour glass, long-hair don’t care, etc. Perhaps your claim to get defamed was dark skin, big lips, elephant ears or a big forehead. Many women are walking around insecurely confident and even those who fit into the mainstream mold are simply posers.

How did my nose “grow” on me? It was all about perspective. When I left the United States and traveled to Jamaica, I was inundated with the experience of being in the majority. Women who looked like me were not only walking next to me on the street but they were all over the TV. They were the norm. Shortly after that India Arie’s “Video” became my theme song and I celebrated the courage of this sista who broke through the glass mirror. I started learning the history of the hierarchy of complexion and physical features, realizing that I was powerfully and wonderfully made.After that I knew that little black girls (and boys) must realize that they are beautiful too. They must see their mommas embrace their stretch marks and hold their heads up high no matter where they find themselves in the world. We must:

1. Counter the campaign to poison black beautyby subscribing to magazines, blogs and programming that celebrate our beauty. This may mean turning off the TV, searching the internet or hanging out with your authentically fabulous girlfriends/family members.

2. Accept the love from partners who love you au naturale. If someone criticizes or verbally abuses your physical characteristics then that is not healthy for you. Run. Fast.

3. Praise the children & young people you have influence over. This is especially important if you have your own children. Tell them how beautiful they are. Let them know the history of race and racism in America.

4. Celebrate yourself! Learn how to dress in clothing that flatters your body type. Spend some time at the spa. Exercise. Do things that bring out the best you!

0 Response to "Insecurely Confident"

    Post a Comment

    Your comments are appreciated.

    AfroElle Magazine

    Tag Cloud

    Featured Couple Reviews Singular Fashion&Style Ladies Talk Featured Article Finances Marriage 101 Sisterpreneur Phenomenal Woman Faith

    Join the Community

    About Me

    My Photo
    AfroElle is an online destination for women of Afro-descent around the world.AfroElle's overall aim is to provide content for black women around the world and for them to find empowerment and encouraged to lead fulfilled lives through this magazine style blog.
    View my complete profile

    Look Around